A bunch of different Carbs were having a chat around the table and bragging about their nutritional content to each other. Broccoli said “Hey Everyone, just check out my florets!”, “Not only am I cool in nature, but I also act as a diuretic and am loaded with Iron, Sulfur, and Vitamins A, C and the Bs!”. Celery responded “Yeah, but lots of people hate your bitter taste”, “I got a little sweet to balance out my bitterness, people like my crunchiness, and my silicon implants keep people’s joints supple, while my fiber is what makes folks give a crap about me!”
Always neutral, Shiitake added “I’m not immune to a little boasting, but I am to viruses and cancers, and we would probably all work well with each other in a dish.”
Rice felt a little steamed at being left out of the conversation thus far and jumped in “Not only am I a staple food in most of the world, but also tasty, act as a source of energy and can be cooked into a porridge that you guys love to swim in! And, I’m nutritious!”.
“Only if you keep your shirt on fella!” the others retorted.
Then Sugar walked in and the table fell silent. “None of you squares will ever be as popular as me. People go out of their way to get me, and once they got me, they hardly ever let go!”, “I’m as bad for the human race as climate change, and yet they still love me, beat that!”
What none of them realized was that they were at a banquet table of politicians and nutritionists who had just finished hammering out new legislation to increase taxes on junk food and end corn subsidies.